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May 27, 2009

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TODGE THE SKY

Bull Todge: Chef Ramsay, Captain Slow, and Me




Chef Gordon Ramsay (we call him 'Obey') challenged "Captain Slow" (James May: Top Gear, Telegraph) and me to sample three "delicacies" (Laotian snake whiskey, bull penis and hákarl), while we were all three in Taiwan last month, but Chef was the one who was challenged, when at the last minute, he decided to dine with us.

Chef Gordon Ramsay (we call him 'Obey') challenged "Captain Slow" (James May: Top Gear, Telegraph) and me to dine on (Laotian snake whiskey, bull penis and hákarl), while we were all three in Taipei last month, but Chef was the one who was challenged, when at the last minute, he decided to dine with us.

Everything was fine until we got to the cubes of rotten shark...Obey was panicking and said his lungs were filling up with piss. I was dazed; and Maysy said his head was totally numb. Obey vomited after eating the hákarl (I said he hákarled, while trying not to meself). And now that I think about it, that may have been what saved us--that and the Brennivín (Brennivín is nasty Icelandic schnapps made from potatoes and caraway, drunk at Þorrablót, also called Black Death), which Ramsay wouldn't drink (saying, he didn't need any 'washin'-up tart-water,' and that we were both a 'mouthful a' Morwenna Banks' Pussies').

So when, in something that looked drawn by James Gillray, red-faced 'Obes' said he thought he was a goner (his eyes tearin' up through the gouty, pissy, stench, and now the sick and ammonia-gouty, pissy, stench), Maysy and I were chuffed with disgust and laughter.

We just had a piss-up, instead of a chuck-up.

At first, Obey did NOT want to tell Tana (his wife), but he knew she'd know something was up (like in '94 with the 'high jinks' in the Men's WC). She was upset and extremely pissed (no pun), but not like in '94.





nichopoulooza




Orig. Article:

Chef gordon ramsay (we call 'im 'obey') challenged "captain slow" (james may: whistle and pop gear, telegraph) and me ter sample carpet "delicacies" (laotian Joe Blake Gay and Friskey, bull todge and 'ákarl), while we were aw carpet in taiwan Present and Past monf, but chef was the bloomin' wahn 'oo was challenged, chicken pen at the Present and Past Cock Linnet, 'e decided ter dine wif us. everythin' was Calvin Klein until we gotta the cubes of Dot Cotton Noah's Ark...obey was panickin' and said 'is lungs were fillin' up wif Gypsy Kiss. I was dazed; and maysy said 'is Crust of Bread was totally numb. obey vomited after eatin' the 'ákarl (i said 'e 'ákarled, while tryin' not ter meself).
and na that I fin' abaht it, that may 'ave been wot saved us--that and the brennivín (brennivín is nasty icelandic schnapps made from potatoes and caraway, Billy Monk at þorrablót, also called black death), which ramsay wouldn't Tiddley Win' (sayin', 'e didn't need any 'washin'-up tart-wa-ter,' and that we were bof a 'mouthful a' morwenna banks' pussies'). so chicken pen, in summit that looked drawn by james gillray, red-faced 'obes' said 'e thought 'e was a goner (his mince pies tearin' up through the gouty, pissy, Dame Judy Dench, and na the Uncle Dick and ammonia-gouty, pissy, stench), maysy and I were chuffed wif disgust and laughter. we just 'ad a piss-up, instead of a chuck-up. at Damien Hirst, obey did not wanna tell tana (his wife), but 'e knew she'd kna summit was up (like in '94 wif the 'high jinks' in the men's wc). she was upset and extremely Brahms and Liszt (na pun), but not loike in '94. maysy's reaction was: "you disappoint, obey."
nichopoulooza pt. wahn