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August 12, 2009
For the Benefit of Mr. Dickinson | Music Features | Memphis Flyer - by Andria Lisle
For the Benefit of Mr. Dickinson | Music Features | Memphis FlyerFor the Benefit of Mr. Dickinson
A Memphis legend gets by with a little help from his friends.
by Andria Lisle
Jim Dickinson
Last week, Memphis-based and world-renowned producer/musical raconteur Jim Dickinson sat at his keyboard and plunked out the notes of Furry Lewis' "Kassie Jones." It was a heroic moment, considering the rocky road Dickinson has traveled the past few months.
"In May, Dad had stents put in his heart, and he felt really good," recounts Dickinson's son Luther, a well-known musician in his own right. "Then he suffered from gastrointestinal bleeding, went back to the hospital, and had a massive heart attack. He got better and came home to recuperate before going in for bypass surgery. His heart stopped, but they brought him back. It's been a slow but steady recovery since then."
Friends and family, including Dickinson's wife, Mary Lindsay, and his younger son, Cody, are encouraged by the 68-year-old musician's determination to play music so soon afterward.
"At one point, he had a Sharpie in his hand and he was holding a notepad, composing, which was just the sweetest thing. His memory and personality are all completely there, and he's getting his creative process together, you know?" Luther says.
Even so, it will be a long while before Dickinson has the strength to reenter the recording studio and command the control board, as he has for artists such as the Replacements, Pete "Sonic Boom" Kember, Toots Hibbert, John Hiatt, and Mudhoney — which is why his friends hastened to stage a benefit concert, which is slated for the Peabody Skyway Saturday, August 8th.
Hiatt will headline the sold-out event, along with Dickinson's sons' band, the North Mississippi Allstars, his longtime bandmate Sid Selvidge, and Big Star drummer Jody Stephens. Also appearing are Jimmy Davis, Shannon McNally, Amy LaVere, Jimbo Mathus, the Yallabushwhackers, and Sons of Mudboy — all musicians who have benefited from an association with Dickinson.
"It's going to be a great night of music, but that's almost beside the point," says event organizer David Less, who heads Memphis International Records, the label behind Dickinson's past three solo albums, including Dinosaurs Run in Circles, which was released in May.
"Memphis music would not sound the same without Jim in the world," Less says. "The people he has mentored and influenced on the local scene have made a difference across musical genres, and the entire community owes a debt to him."
Despite the fact that a benefit was held in Oxford, Mississippi, last weekend and another event is on the books for San Francisco later this year, hundreds of supporters have already stepped up, donating time and money to the cause.
Although he's unable to attend, Elvis Costello purchased a table for Saturday's concert, to be auctioned later this week. The Peabody hotel offered space, and the staffs at Ardent Records and at Beale Street Caravan are handling ticket sales and donations. Less credits industry insiders Bob Merlis and Bill Bentley for petitioning major labels and recording artists — ranging from Aretha Franklin and Arlo Guthrie to Ry Cooder and the Rolling Stones — to relinquish recording rights for a limited-edition CD of songs Dickinson either produced or played on, which will be distributed at the event.
"Jim's got Medicare, so fortunately, we're not needing to raise a half-million dollars. He hasn't worked since May, so we just want to make sure he doesn't go broke. People shouldn't go bankrupt if they get sick," Less says.
With a forced layoff of two months, Dickinson can use the help.
Luther says, "Everyone is so financially fragile right now, but being my parents' ages and not having a stable future is really scary. I think retirement is a mirage."
Throughout the whole process, Dickinson has reminded his sons to "take care of your mom and play your gigs."
Both Luther and Cody have taken the advice to heart, substituting for their father at what was supposed to be his May 31st CD-release party at Huey's and forging ahead with their respective groups, which include the Black Crowes and Hill Country Revue.
"Music is what's always held our family together," Luther says. "This [experience] is just one of those things that has made me reevaluate what I want to do with my band. It's proved to me how important music is in making the world go around and how important it is to the strength and continuation of my family.
"Waking up every morning is a blessing, and lifting your arm and feeding yourself is a blessing," Luther says, reiterating the words of his late friend and frequent music collaborator, bluesman Otha Turner.
"I pray that Dad is through the worst of it. Once he gets his strength back, you'd better watch out."
Daily News » Help me please…herpes? via @via sarai7754
Ok so this may sound dumb but this morning I woke up with 2 little water-filled blisters on my bottom lip and im nervous as hell about what it is. Let me clarify that normally I wouldn’t have thought twice about it, I would just have assumed it to be a fever blister. The reason i’m freakin out is bc i have a friend that i know has some kind of herpe like std and on this past sunday I shook his hand to tell him bye right after he finished taken a piss and remember scrathching my lip soon there after. I remember bc I made a joke to my girlfriend that I better wash my hands or I’ll get herpes and now this morning i wake up with this ****. Attached is picture of it. Can anyone let me know what it may be. Don’t sugar coat it give it to me straight.
Daily News » Help me please…herpes?
Twitter / Search - Goodnight
Twitter / Search - GoodnightReal-time results for Goodnight
50 more results since you started searching. Refresh to see them.
OhhhJama a penny for your thoughts.. goodnight!
morgyyysmith @Xxsatroi goodnight darling. love youuu. xx
1mbalanc3d @simplygorgeous lol goodnight
Le0123 Goodnight
ambeeee Just finished eating some pasta, and now i'm going to bed.. Its so bad, but so good! Goodnight :)
MrKhaotik @TheCarter09 Goodnight PHI
puruchi Goodnight GoodNites Underpants for Boys, Large/Extra-Large, Mega Pack, 21 Underpants:-http://bit.ly/7PQOW
FRIENDLYPRINCES otay this was sent to me and thought it was great..goodnight twitter dums and dees...http://www.viddler.com/explore/jesucristotv/videos/1/
metsguy234 ok, now it's bed time... Goodnight
Scottieterrier Going to sleep. GOODnight.
veronicaa_ i think i'll sleeep now, goodnight.
everyonehatesKC Goodnight twitter...I am so confused.
juliex69 @StickyIckyNeese Goodnight
JHPunk Talk to y'all bright and early tomorrow....well maybe bright and early if I can get up. Goodnight!! :D
Janine_vdWater @_CrystalVisions Ow nee, wacht.....je bedoelde die MSN Goodnight-wish. Ik heb werkelijk geen idee, maar mijn weten niet.
rjdennis @studentbuddha Goodnight and sweet dreams to you! :) *cuddle* *muah*
JulietSimmsALL already seen 16..I have lots of hope and dreams..goodnight xo
omqshissamber Goodnight... School at 9:40
oremord Goodnight twitter people:)
eutrohircanles Goodnight Cialis $1.9 Viagra $1.1 http://xfq.mymissilecrisis.cn
Want a SECOND Look at Perez Hilton’s New Site? – Evil Beet Gossip (from my favorite twitter profile face)
Want a First Look at Perez Hilton’s New Site? – Evil Beet Gossip
Perez Hilton launches his new website, CocoPerez.com, on Thursday. If you go to the website now, there’s only a blank page and a login. But I’m sorta computer-savvy, and his developers clearly are not, and so I poked around a bit to get a first look at the homepage. The rumors have been that this is going to be a website targeting women around the 26-year-old demographic, using “longer-form” editorial content, but what it looks like to me is PerezHilton.com but focusing on the fashion world. I mean, in some of these posts, he’s still drawing on photos. (I think he’s trying to remain true to the brand, but it doesn’t play well with the “more mature audience” concept. Drop that part, Mario.)
The longer-form editorials appear to consist of a paragraph or so more than his traditional pieces. For instance, he ran this piece about the new Harvard clothing line on his current site. The mock-up for the new site includes that same article, but with the last paragraph expanded to say this:
This is all fine and well, but there is one lingering question: why?? This is from so far left field. We would understand if The New School or RISD or any number of artistic/fashion focused schools launched a line - it would still be unusual but at least a logical progression. But this?? This is just so random. Especially since Harvard isn’t exactly thought of as the apex of fashion. This is like Janet Reno announcing she’s launching a line of lingerie. You just can’t get your head around it because it’s so…bizarre.
Well, at least they’ve got our attention!
Ohhhhhh man. Mario, dude, you’re not cut out for “longer-form” editorial. The more you “write,” the more obvious it becomes that you’re a gossip hound and famewhore, but clearly not a “writer.” This concept doesn’t play to your strengths; rather, it exposes your weaknesses. Tell ya what, buddy: You stick to short-form editorial and the Fidel Castro beat, and I’ll handle being funny and insightful for the both of us. Side note: Want me to manage your IT department, too?
Neverland Visitor: "I Was Molested By Jacko's Ghost"
Neverland Visitor: "I Was Molested By Jacko's Ghost"Neverland Visitor: "I Was Molested By Jacko's Ghost"
July 7th, 2009
The 12 year old boy who has not been named yet, has made the extraordinary claim to the Los Angeles County Sheriff's Office and also filed a lawsuit against the Jackson estate.
"According to the boy he was with his family on a tour when the group were shown Jacko's room in Neverland. He claims that a shadow came out of the wall and started to do bad things to him. We asked him how he knew it was Jackson, well, he said the ghost had one white glove and moonwalked across the floor before attempting to molest the boy. There were also witnesses to the whole sordid affair and even a photograph," the Sheriff's Deputy, Jordy Culkin was quoted in the LA Times.
Since the incident, the Neverland Tour has been suspended, and paranormal investigators have been called in. There are even plans to bring in an exorcist to try and rid the place of the moonwalking molester.
The ghostly molestation has seriously affected the boy who is now receiving councilling and his parents are very angry that no one warned them of Jackson.
"This is a terrible awful event which has affected us all. Jacko was not happy with molesting little boys in real life and now he's doing it from beyond the grave? What a sick f***er!" the boys father told TMZ.
Clair Elisabeth Fields Cruise: TOP 50 OR SO 'CEFC' CRAZIEST HITS (* denotes @mrjyn personal favorites)
MJ 'Wife' Claire De Loon: "Leonardo DiCaprio, Will You Marry Me?!"
I'LL LET CLAIRE SPEAK FOR THEMSELVES:
Claire Cruise, 41, is in dire need of a leading gentleman, especially considering the fact that Claire will not have to be elected to become the next president of the United States. Claire and Leo secretly dated on and off for 8 months between 1998 and 1999. Recorded in Atlanta, Georgia on July 3rd, 2007: the exact, same day that Claire got married in 1985, Tom Cruise's 45th birthday as well as the day of Mentor and Disciple in Nichiren Buddhism.
MY ORIGINAL POST FROM MONDAY:
I spent the better part of a rainy afternoon combing, Her Holiness's MySpace Press Conference you see here--all neatly collected in the same nut - http://tinyurl.com/lqskwu .
http://www.visualguidanceltd.blogspot...
follow @mrjyn Twitter HERE:
http://twitter.com/mrjyn
Claire Elisabeth Fields Cruise, INTRODUCE Your SELF
http://bit.ly/1ytHWu
- To correct Chris's erroneous parents, Chris went out with me when we were both 17, NOT 16. And our bond has continued to survive.
- THERE IS NO RESTRAINING ORDER and this is why both Bruce Williamson and Chris Caputo, MY EMPLOYEES, have no comment about this to the media.
- I was the one who picked Chris Caputo to be my CEO, however.
- Bruce Williamson never knew my Grandmother (they met only once) & this is precisely why she picked him to manage MY money in my ABSENCE.
- Chris's mom should know that Chris has the most severe form of erectile dysfunction & chemicals in MY body are only thing that corrects it.
- Before that, the last time that Chris had seen me was when he visited me in Santa Monica in 1997 to rape me by way of date-rape drugs.
- The last time I saw Chris Caputo in person was when we crossed paths at a Hollywood coffee house in the fall of 2007.
- Ross Dreiblatt gave me date-rape drugs so Julian could have sex with me. I couldn't remember anything, thought I was going out with Chris.
- I'll have everyone know that it was Julian Bleecker who thought he had a relationship with me in high school when he raped me again & again.
- This is why all these people try so hard to label me: Bruce, my next of kin, is trying to hold on to MY money & Gail Caputo fears exposure.
- As for Bruce Williamson, he is the idiot who has tried to stop me from getting MY vast inheritance. Grandma would literally kill him.
- Mrs. Gail Caputo was always so jealous of the control I had over her son, Chris, because she was sexually abusing Chris and his 2 siblings.
- Chris's parents do not have any idea that Chris and I have always remained in touch.
- I can't believe how fat I look on TV!
- Sorry Michael... I deserve so much better.
- Michael Joseph Jackson, I officially "approved" my official engagement to Chris just before killing himself on June 25, 2009.
- My official engagement to Christopher Joseph Caputo of Fortress Group, Inc./Fortress Investment is officially CANCELLED.
- JUDGE BECKLOFF: I'd so much appreciate it if you could once again delay this hearing until Monday, September 7, 2009. I WILL BE THERE!!!!!!
- JUDGE BECKLOFF: I'm sorry, but I can't make the probate hearing on Monday, August 3, 2009. NO MONEY until my SSI comes in on that very day!
- ATTENTION: JUDGE BECKLOFF Your rude assistnt always tells me that I can't communicate with you unless I figure out which document to file.
RT @mrjyn - http://bit.ly/cmeQV - AND FOLLOW NICHOPOULOUZO'(*since this story is getting so much play, I thought I'd clean up the Clair Elisabeth Fields Cruise bullet-list which I attempted to compile and order Monday, and add some headers and star some of my CRAZIEST HITS...And, since I am a blogger, and not being paid to report this, I started in the middle and then became overwhelmed by the end--which is to say, the lack of stars in the beginning, does not denote any demotion of General Cruise--in fact, 'IF' by any chance, she served in World War II, it is my guess that she was very well-decorated.)
mrjyn
Don't forget to embed my NICHOPOULOUZO YOUTUBE 'CEFC' PRESS CONFERENCE VIDEO via TMZ, IF LINKING TO THIS LIST.
(MySpace: A Place For Friends)
(HEADLINE)
Claire Cruise Is America waiting, waiting, waiting...
Claire Elisabeth Fields Cruise Female 43 years old South Miami, Florida Claire Cruise Is America's Details Status: Engaged Here for: Friends Orientation: Straight Hometown: Princeton, NJ Body type: 5' 5" Ethnicity: White / Caucasian Religion: Buddhist Zodiac Sign: Libra Smoke / Drink: No / Yes Children: Proud parent Education: Some college Occupation: World Peace Leader Income: Less than $30,000 June 12, 1994 - present Fortress Investment New York, New York US
(HER INTRO, NOT MINE)
"Introducing PRESIDENT CLAIRE Elisabeth CRUISE, otherwise known as: Queen Claire Elisabeth, Pope Claire Elisabeth I, High Priestess Claire Daishonin, Her Holiness The Dalai Lama, The Prophet, The Messiah, Christ, God(dess), Allah, Savior and Leader of the Free World."
(JACKO COMMITTED SUICIDE OUT OF JEALOUSY)
WHEN MY LEGAL HUSBAND, MICHAEL JOSEPH JACKSON WAS INFORMED THAT CHRISTOPHER JOSEPH CAPUTO AND I HAD SUCCESSFULLY BECOME OFFICIALLY ENGAGED, MICHAEL TOOK HIS OWN LIFE.
"I am the biological mother of Prince Michael Jackson II and all of his siblings."
Before I matured into a woman who could naturally conceive, however, scientists were combining my DNA together with other DNA to create babies in the laboratory.
They've been doing this since the time I was just an embryo and they continue to do this to this very day.
For example, the actor, Brad Pitt, was created by combining the DNA from the dead body of Jimmy Dean (Brad in his past life!) together with the DNA from the embryo that was me.
My biological daughter, Brooke Shields, was also brought into existence in this same manner, although I doubt her biological father was any kind of dead body.
I am the biological mother of all of Michael Jackson's children: Prince, Paris and Blanket. could no longer afford to fax paperwork, I was forced to send this Petition by Priority Mail with Delivery Confirmation.
Judge Beckloff has delayed the guardianship hearing.
Tito must be cueing me to contact your organization.
Michael Jackson told his entire family all about me; for decades already have they been eagerly awaiting the time when "PYT" would reveal herself to the world.
I am also still LEGALLY married to Michael Jackson.
I also am engaged to Blanket's biological father: my high school sweetheart, Christopher Joseph Caputo
The biological father of Prince and Paris is my former winemaker boyfriend, Cyril Rouhaut of the south west of France.
Michael Jackson and my fiance, Italian Chris Caputo, have a common ancestor.
However, Connor Cruise is Michael's biological son, whom I personally conceived.
Michael knew this when he allowed Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidman to adopt him some years ago.
I had not yet realized, remembered, or received confirmation that Cyril's and my last embryo was swapped for one of Chris's and mine.
Debbie Rowe is a surrogate mother. I have never been paid for what my body naturally created (nor did I ever so selflessly donate my eggs to science).
I am the organizer for Princeton High School Class reunion.
I will not let my classmates down.
Okay, world: Susan Taylor Shellenbarger began fucking MY Chris Caputo on the side in May, right after Bruce dumped her before School prom.
The biological father of both Prince Michael Joseph Jackson, Jr. and Paris-Michael Katherine Jackson is Cyril Rouhaut of France.
The biological father of Blanket Michael Jackson, II is MY OFFICIAL fiance, Christopher Joseph Caputo of New York, NY.
I am the sole biological mother of all three Jackson children.
Because I am what is known as a savant, the details that fill my meticulous memory banks are staggering.
But unlike most other savants, i.e., Rainman, I do not have any disability whatsoever.
The genius brain I would have been born with had my mother not habitually drank hard liquor and allowed Stanford doctors to routinely inject her with heroin during pregnancy would not be nearly as advanced as my savant brain is.
Due to all the adversities I had to contend with inside AND OUTSIDE my mother's womb, my genius brain over-developed in its desperate effort to compensate for what damage was done to it.
Technically, a savant brain is injured, but in all the areas of my brain that aren't as over-developed, I have always routinely fallen within the normal range.
What this means is that my brain is far more advanced than it would have been had I been born to a healthy, drug and alcohol-free mother.
My brain does things I don't even understand.
Debbie Rowe has absolutely no idea that I exist.
I suppose, as a society, we are still quite naive when it comes to embryonic technologies.
The whole point of surrogacy is that the person is merely a vessel
How could we be so gullible as a society to believe that a woman who was hired and paid vast amounts of money by Michael Jackson to give birth to his children was ALSO the biological mother of these same children?
Because we give birth--we women harbor quite a lot of control when it comes to the children in our society.
To minimize the control that mere birth gives to a woman in a surrogate situation, it would be vitally important to make sure that she is NOT also the biological mother.
My naturally conceived embryos belong to only me.
I did not voluntarily donate my eggs or profit in any way from what my body naturally created.
I suppose the fact that Michael actually married Debbie Rowe had a lot to do with why we as a society assumed she was not just a surrogate mother.
So many married women in our society are technically surrogate mothers without ever knowing it.
My own sterile mother is an example of this.
The truth is that most women in our society are sterile.
This has been carefully planned so that MY embryos could be properly distributed.
Unlike my biological sons, all my biological daughters are completely sterile.
In the laboratory, however, it is possible for scientists to combine a sterile woman's DNA together with a man's to create a test-tube baby.
I can't help but think that Debbie Rowe had to have been told that it was an embryo, NOT SPERM, that doctors were "injecting" into her uterus.
He would not have ever allowed Debbie to think that those babies were hers.
But now that Michael is dead, perhaps Debbie thinks that she has it in the bag.
Why would Michael Jackson pick Debbie Rowe to be the biological mother of his children?
What is so special about Debbie Rowe that Michael wanted to breed her?!
Debbie Rowe was just someone in the right place at the right time, desperately offering her body up to Michael Jackson.
Michael killed himself Today.
I want the family to understand that Michael was suffering a great deal.
He had reached the point where he was done being Michael Jackson.
In the days leading up to his death, Michael was so happy to be performing again.
Nothing makes him happier than being upon a stage.
Michael was finding it far more difficult than he had ever imagined.
With just weeks to go till his worldwide tour, Michael was just not in the kind of shape he was accustomed to being in.
And, being the obsessive perfectionist that he has always been, Michael didn't want to do it anymore.
Michael was made well aware of my homelessness and it was stressed to him what an incredible mother I would be if only someone would give me a chance to mother my many naturally conceived and other biological children I have all around the world.
After confirming that I would be the best parent to his children, Michael deliberately overdosed on sleeping medications in his desperate effort to finally sleep.
*Remember, I was Michael when I was just a girl.
I AM LEGALLY MARRIED TO MICHAEL JACKSON.
(MySpace Profile) Current mood: impatient. (MySpace Headline) Time's up, Jackson Family!
My legal documents indicate that I have requested mediation to work out a parenting plan.
(Katherine Jackson's Visitation Schedule)
*I think that Mrs Jackson should have the right to visit the children as follows: only in a supervised setting to ensure the children's safety from respondent's husband, Joseph Jackson.
I was abused as a child.
(Future Inheritance)
Until I receive the vast inheritance left to only me by my maternal grandmother, I survive on a very minimal Florida Social Security Income which so easily qualified me for a waiver of all court fees & costs.
I shall be receiving my inheritance very shortly.
I will NOT be requesting any kind of child support from the Michael Jackson Family Trust.
(French Winemaker Father of ALL THREE children, Cyril Rouhaut)
And, for everyone's information, the biological father of all three of Michael Jackson's children is my former boyfriend, Cyril Rouhaut of the Southwest of France.
Cyril is a winemaker whose family lives on and manages one of my family estates.
Cyril and I attempted to have a baby together.
(Immaculate Conception)
It was during this time that I naturally conceived Prince, Paris and Blanket, as well as two other children whom I had already located--all embryos were safely removed from my uterus less than one month after conception to immediately be frozen and later implanted in the uterus of a surrogate mother.
Of course the public has yet to be informed of the advanced embryonic technologies that make something like this possible.
(Unveiling Paris, Prince and Blanket)
Although I knew that I was the biological mother of all three of Michael Jackson's children, I hadn't yet remembered who the biological father of these same children was until I could better view Prince, Paris and Blanket without the obstruction of their veils.
It is due to all the trauma I went through as a child as well as an adult that I am still in the process of remembering some very key details of my life.
(Titanic Revelation)
Leo DiCaprio and I have a mutual, dear friend who brought Michael to my house in Princeton, NJ to surprise me on my birthday.
Although I gave Michael my personal tour of the town of Princeton and really did like him quite a lot, our marriage was strictly business.
It was before Thriller, and Michael had just completed his first round of plastic surgery.
Thus, I didn't actually understand that the **************dancing African-American musician named Michael Joseph Jackson I married that evening was, indeed, the famous Michael Jackson whom everyone knew and loved.
(Rabbi Wedding Photos of Kissing)
Ross Dreiblatt, also a rabbi, not only married us, he also took our wedding photos, one of which features Michael and I kissing (... if not mistaken).
The entire legal ceremony was also video-taped.
(Paul McCartney's Worst Nightmare)
When Michael then asked my permission to purchase the Beatles catalog, I casually replied, "sure!" without any conscious understanding of my business connection to this catalog.
As I cannot afford to send anymore faxes until next month, the sheriff will be prevented from serving Mrs Jackson until late August.
I also cannot afford to send away for Michael's and my marriage license until next month, but please do feel free to send away for it, yourself.
(MySpace Mood Update)
Current mood: pissed off.
(Pretty Darn Shocking Revelation To Come)
I am waiting on the family of Michael Jackson to personally respond to me before I announce yet another bizarre detail of my life that's pretty darn shocking.
(Reason Michael Jackson Killed Self)
WHEN MY LEGAL HUSBAND, MICHAEL JOSEPH JACKSON WAS INFORMED THAT CHRISTOPHER JOSEPH CAPUTO AND I HAD SUCCESSFULLY BECOME OFFICIALLY ENGAGED, MICHAEL TOOK HIS OWN LIFE.
(Marriage To Tom Cruise Decree)
LET IT BE KNOWN THAT MY (NON-LEGAL) ENGAGEMENT TO HUSBAND, THOMAS CRUISE MAPOTHER WAS OFFICIALLY "APPROVED" BY MICHAEL JOSEPH JACKSON I I.
AFTER OUR WEDDING, TOM TOOK MY SUGGESTION AND DROPPED HIS ABUSIVE FATHER'S LAST NAME TO BECOME, JUST THOMAS CRUISE.
IT WAS MY PROMISE TO TOM THAT I WOULD ONE DAY DO THE VERY SAME THING.
(Changing Her Name And Keeping Her Promise to Cruise)
I FINALLY FULFILLED MY PROMISE WHEN I FILED FOR MY LEGAL NAME CHANGE AFTER TOM'S WEDDING TO KATIE HOLMES IN DECEMBER OF .
MICHAEL TOLD ME THAT I MADE HIM THE HAPPIEST MAN ALIVE...
(Songwriting CV)
ESPECIALLY AFTER I APPROVED HIS PURCHASE OF MY BEATLES CATALOG AND ALLOWED HIM TO CONTINUE TO TAKE CREDIT FOR ALL MY SONGS THAT HE WOULD RECORD AND/OR PERFORM.
(Wedding Night Thriller Jacket Outfit)
*****************ON OUR WEDDING NIGHT MICHAEL EVEN WORE HIS FAMOUS TRADEMARK RED LEATHER JACKET THAT HE HAD DEBUTED TO THE WORLD IN OUR VIDEO, THRILLER.
YES, I LEGALLY CHANGED MY NAME TO CLAIRE ELISABETH JACKSON WHEN SIGNING OUR MARRIAGE DOCUMENTS.
(Realization of Nuptials At Supermarket Checkout Line)
I CAN REMEMBER MY SHOCK WHEN NOTICING THAT THE NATIONAL ENQUIRER ACTUALLY PUBLISHED THESE SAME WEDDING PHOTOS WITH MY FACE BLURRED AND FADED OUT.
WHEN I SAW THEM ON THE NEWSSTAND, I BECAME SO VERY CONFUSED, I JUST COULDN'T HANDLE IT AND INSTANTLY BLOCKED OUT ALL MEMORIES OF THE EVENT.
MY GREATEST FEAR WAS THAT CHRIS CAPUTO WOULD SEE THESE WEDDING PHOTOS.
AT THE TIME OF OUR WEDDING CEREMONY, I JUST DID NOT UNDERSTAND THAT I HAD MARRIED THE FAMOUS MICHAEL JACKSON EVERYONE KNOWS AND LOVES.
I DO NOT KNOW WHY THAT IS.
ON THE EVE OF RON'S AND NICOLE BROWN SIMPSON'S BRUTAL MURDER, I WORE A PALE GREEN, FLOWERED DRESS.
(???)
BECAUSE NEITHER RON NOR MYSELF ACTUALLY KNEW THAT ROSS WAS A RABBI, WE DIDN'T ACTUALLY KNOW THIS WEDDING WAS FOR REAL AND LEGAL. THIS WAS DONE TO COMPLETE A "TRANSACTION" SO THAT I COULD RECEIVE MY INHERITANCE. THE NEXT MORNING, NOT REALIZING WE WERE ALREADY MARRIED, I FINALLY AGREED TO MARRY RON, AND WAS FORCED TO BREAK UP WITH MY ABSENTEE BOYFRIEND BY VOICEMAIL IN ORDER TO BECOME "ENGAGED" TO RON (OR SO WE THOUGHT).
(No Relation to The OB/GYN...)
*************LET IT BE KNOWN THAT I HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO KNOWN RELATION TO THE OB/GYN KNOWN AS WARREN DUNLAP ELLIOTT, OR HIS WIFE, CLAIRE .
(SWEAR TO GOD: DID NOT MAKE THIS NEXT ONE UP [OH, GOD, I'VE STARTED USING ALL-CAPS])
******************I co-wrote the Queen classic you hear: We Are the Champions.
(Roofies)
To be clear, I naturally conceived this baby without my prior consent or knowledge, by way of date-rape drugs... for breeding purposes.
(WHAM!)
**************George Michael, who is actually one of Ross's many personas, whom I helped to name, also slightly resembles Chris Caputo.
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