(video) Australian Tourism: Piss off! He couldn't find his arse with both hands - even if his fingers were flashlights!!

	Piss off.
	Bore it up 'em!
	Havin' a wank.
	Go to buggery!
	Floggin the log.
	Pissed as a fart.
	To do your lolly.
	Not the full quid.
	Hold yer horses!
	Yer a right galah!
	I'll give yer a bell.
	Have a butchers.
	Come in - spinner.
	He spat the dummy.
	Fair suck of the sav!
	Don't stick yer bib in!
	Crook as Rookwood.
	He's got the good oil.
	Get off yer high horse.
	Cock-and-bull stories.
	Fair crack of the whip!
	Give them a thrashing.
	As scarce as hen's teeth.
	Fits like a bum in a bucket.
	He's about to do his block.
	I feel like a dog's breakfast.
	He's as game as Ned Kelly.
	Built like a brick shit house.
	What do you do for a crust?
	It's not worth a brass razoo.
	What a load of old cobblers!
	Well that's down the gurgler.
	Flat out like a lizard drinking.
	Scarce as rocking horse shit.
	I'm gonna strangle a brownie.
	You look like a stunned mullet.
	He's gone to drain the dragon.
	As cunning as a shit house rat.
	I'll go and have a Captain Cook.
	Several palings short of a fence.
	Shoot through like a Bondi tram.
	About as useful as tits on a bull.
	Got you by the short and curlies.
	As ugly as a hat-full of arseholes.
	Don't get your knickers in a knot.
	You wouldn't work in an iron lung.
	A few sausages short of the B.B.Q.
	He could drink you under the table.
	Go through you like a dose of salts!
	Happy as a bastard on Father's Day.
	A good root and a fart would kill him.
	I'm off to the bog to leave an offering.
	I wouldn't touch it with a forty foot pole.
	Don't come the raw prawn with me mate!
	I could eat the horse and chase the rider.
	And you can bet London to a brick on that!
	He got a head on him like a sucked mango.
	Don't piss on my back and tell me it's rainin!
	Couldn't tell his ass from a hole in the ground.
	He's off like a bucket of prawns in the hot sun.
	Not enough brains to give I'm self a headache!
	Better than a poke in the eye with a burnt stick.
	The most fun you can have with your pants on.
	So tight that he wouldn't shout if a shark bit him.
	You would last about as long as a fart in a blizzard.
	You've got a head like the rough end of the pineapple.
	May your ears turn into arseholes and shit on your shoulders.
	May your chooks turn into emus and kick your dunny door down.
	So stupid that he wouldn't know if a tram was up him 'til the bell rang!
	He wouldn't know if a brass band was up him unless he got the drum!
	He couldn't find his arse with both hands - even if his fingers were flashlights!

Australian Tourism

Posted to See Ya At What Gets Me hot via Dogmeat