SEO

July 10, 2010

Red Heat (1988)

The Cast of Characters:
Arnold Schwarzenegger as Ivan DankoIvan Danko (Arnold Schwarzenegger). A deeply serious police officer who dispenses bullets much more freely than his words. Has a crew cut that falls somewhere between that of Ivan Drago and Vanilla Ice.
Jim Belushi as Arthur RidzicArthur Ridzic (Jim Belushi). The prototypical good cop who’s always in trouble. He dispenses bullets as freely as his one-liners. He dresses poorly, runs poorly, but gets the damned job done. Just don’t grade him on neatness.
Ed O'Ross as Viktor RostaViktor Rosta (Ed O'Ross). The surly heavy. He recognizes the changes coming to Russia and wants to cash in by introducing Western-style drugs to the public, even though importing Western-style razors might have been more profitable.
Gina Gershon as Cat ManzettiCat Manzetti (Gina Gershon). Her real name is Catherine, but she goes by “Cat” to follow the four-syllable naming convention of the other characters. As the lone female in the cast, she wears a leotard and perspires, but otherwise doesn’t do much. She should have changed her hair color using Clairol dye #1829, “Red Herring”.

[Webmaster’s note: Special thanks go out to Joshua Hutcheson for helping to proofread and edit this recap!]

Among the biggest accomplishments of the 1980s was the restructuring of the Soviet Empire in the years of Reagan and Gorbachev. The Cold War came to a close, the Berlin Wall came down, and ALF dominated the Nielsen ratings. It was a glorious era which today’s generation cannot truly fathom, given their world of international conflict and mostly alien-free sitcoms.

Back then, Carolco Productions and Columbia Pictures felt they could distill the magic of the political climate and the dawning of a new world order into a formula cop movie. It might sound like an asinine idea, but you have to understand the happy delirium we all felt at the time. It just seemed so possible!

As serious as this movie may have been intended, the outcome actually looked like a comical fiasco in short order.

The recap continues after this advertisement...

Posted via email from Dogmeat